I’ll start off with an easy one. Probably the most important day I had since I have been here.
A lot of people talk about how their wedding was the most special day of their lives. Something which they’ll never forget. It’s easy to dismiss this when you haven’t gone through it. The energy, the nervousness or outright fear, people everywhere, yet a kind of silence hanging in the air, as if even the atmosphere around us was holding its breath….
…. I take in my own breath….
Saya terima nikahnya kakak perempuan Saudara, Dian Anugrah Muharjo Andayani binti Haji Mumambri, nikah untuk saya sendiri, dengan mas kawin seperangkat alat solat dibayar tunai.
… and the world breathes again.
What had previously been a nerve-wracking, heart-pounding ordeal, is suddenly lifted. The constant memorising of those few lines disappears from the front of my mind (though I wonder if I will ever forget those words before I die) and is replaced not just by relief- but by happiness.
“They could not wipe the smile off his face” people sometimes say. Well its true, nothing could remove that smile from my face. I just did the most right thing I could have ever done. I did the most right thing I could have ever done for my (now) wife. We were married before my family, her family, our friends.
The melati necklace draped around me smells fresher than it did when we arrived at the mosque. Our union has breathed new life into it. Or perhaps its only now that I truly notice how wonderful it smells with her next to me.
When its time for us to change for the reception, everything feels lighter. The jacket and peci which felt like they were strangling me earlier seem to expand, and I breathe easily. Before changing clothes though, there is something else to be done…
allahu akbar allahuakbar…
Adzan calls and I go to give thanks. Thank you for bringing me here 5 years ago. Thank you for leading me to her. Thank you for letting everything run so smoothly despite it all. Thank you for it all.
My final sujud is the longest, subhaana rabbiyal a’la wabihamdih, subhaana rabbiyal a’la wabihamdih, subhaana rabbiyal a’la wabihamdih. I don’t know what to say. What else can I say before He who has created all and yet has seen it fit to make me so happy. I can only say thank you and I hope I do not let you down.
The new clothes for the reception feel perfect. They were tailored, yes, but I don’t think it would matter. The material, the peci, everything. Even in the heat it felt perfect.
Our friends. People I haven’t seen in years! They still remember us. They’re happy for us! We’re happy they came!
I hold her every opportunity I get. Or fuss over her. She feels different now. I feel closer to her than before.
The afternoon comes and closes our day. The euphoria slowly begins to subside, but the memory of it does not. I need only look at the photos, hear the sounds, remember that day… and the smile returns again.